Bailout, Schmailout! Brother, can you spare a dime? An Open Letter to Congress

Dear Morons and Moronettes,

How dare you!  You out-absurded The Absurdiatrician himself. Scraping the bottom of the intellectual barrel and creating new depths of partisan name-calling, you have quite effectively plunged this country into what will be a far worse depression then the Great One that your grandparents probably told you about.   If you don't pass some kind of bailout bill tomorrow, this is the end of the world as we know it. 

I hope you saved the contact information of your constituents who were brainwashed into badgering you into voting against this plan.

When they complain to you that their bank won't cash their check even though they have money in their account; when they scream that their Social Security check fails the sniff test; when they complain that the ATM machine won't give them any cash for lunch, even though they have plenty of cash in their account?

What are you going to tell them?  "Gee golly, Earl, I only did what you asked me to do."   

What comes mind is the eternal childhood excuse "I did it because Billy did it", as well as the equally eternal maternal response "Would you jump off a cliff just because Billy did it?" 

Yo dudes!! You've done it this time. You've jumped off the cliff and took the country with you. Except this time you did because your Mama told you to.   What good little boys and girls you are.  

NOT.

You lemmings! You sheep! You spineless invertebrates!

And for all of you taxpayers who wrote your Congressperson telling them you "weren't going spend none of my hard earned money to bailout no Wall Street tycoon, and if you vote for it, you are history" --

Congratulations!

You have proven wrong H. L. Mencken's quote "Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public"  You have just "broke" yourself. Just today alone, your 401k's have paid twice as much as the bailout would have cost.  

Not to say I told you so, but check the blog below dated last Friday.  In it I asked how the taxpayer would even know they had paid for a bailout.  Well, now they know.

Everybody together now, "Brother, can you spare a dime"?